The Case of the Weeping Wallet

I knew it would be one of those days. We mere males have them at times and often the best laid plans of mice and men often go awry. It’s an interesting saying that one and a saying that was applicable to my morning. I knew straight away when Candika and I were having breakfast, and yours truly was happily munching away on a fresh slice of Papaya that my day just might be disorganised, so to speak. Indeed, I knew what I had intended to do today – just write on the laptop and chill out. It was a good day for it but my plans went awry when Candika nonchalantly said “Darling I know you have nothing to do today except write on that computer thingie” Patiently I waited for the sledgehammer to hit. “Let’s go to Geneva. I haven’t been there yet and we can just go for a look. We don’t have to buy anything”. When women use that phrase ’we don’t have to buy anything’, it’s scary. The Papaya I was devouring just didn’t seem to taste the same. What’s a mere male to do, say ‘no’ and be in coventry for a day or so, or, submit to the whims of a passionate shopper. I swallowed the last piece Of Papaya and washed it down with a gulp of Kopi Bali.

At least the taxi driver was happy to drive us to Kerobokan where Geneva is located. His silent grinning unnerved me as if he had been subject to some horrific shopping experience in the past and like the Cheshire cat he was, proceeded to tell Candika about Geneva, what was for sale there and happily emphasised just how cheap everything was. What a traitor to the male clan he turned out to be! Candika was fidgeting in her handbag, suddenly stopped and said, looking me right in the eyes “Waduh, dompetku saya meninggalkan di Prawita” She had left her purse at the Prawita. How convenient. She smiled at me and cheekily stated “Its okay, you have your wallet don’t you darling” Just once it would be great if all males in the world taking their wives or girlfriends out shopping forgot their wallets. Shit, that would me Armageddon! Truly, what is a mere male to do? Mr Cheshire Cat driver was grinning even more intensely and seemingly happy that I was soon to be subjected to the ruthlessness of a woman bent hell on shopping without fear of retribution.

Located on Jl Raya Kerobokan, Geneva looks more like a bombed out building from the outside than a place for ripping the guts out of my wallet. However, once you climb the stairs and enter the premises, it is a fabulous place for those seeking good quality, locally produced handicrafts and I might add, at reasonable prices. The staff were helpful, at least that’s what Candika thought as we were offered a choice of a carry basket or shopping trolley. I made a gesture for the carry basket but Candika had already disappeared into the aisles with a shopping trolley. I could hear my wallet crying in my back pocket.

Geneva Handicraft Centre is as the name states, a massive couple of floors of every kind of handicraft available on the island including clothing and batik. It truly is a one-stop shop for any tourist visiting Bali. Everything you could buy at the Kuta market or in fact anywhere else on the island can be found in Geneva. The aisles are spacious and everything is sectionalised for your convenience. What particularly impressed me was the vast range of products available. I must admit I enjoyed walking around Geneva perusing everything.

After a few hours filling the shopping trolley Candika thought enough was enough and headed for the check-out. Right at this moment my wallet was begging for mercy. After paying the bill it was back down the stairs and into taxi. ‘Great’ I though, I can get some writing done now. The crazy thing is that to get back to Kuta you travel via the Sunshine Road. You haven’t guessed it yet. Right? Continuing with the morning’s escapade, the taxi soon approached Carrefour Shopping Complex. Oh, you did guess it correct! The taxi driver dropped us off at the entrance and my wallet declared it was going AWOL. A couple of hours there was totally draining my grey matter of any creative ideas and we soon were back in a taxi but not heading back to the Prawita. From Carrefour it is not far to the Kuta Galleria. This mere male has immeasurable amounts of patience and just for the record, I hate shopping! At the Galleria I was steadfast in my demand for nourishment and this was agreed to by my better half but only after she had ‘looked around’ the Matahari Dept Store. I convinced my wallet that this overwhelming ordeal would soon be over and it decided against suicide.

Such were my plans for the morning of writing with a happy wallet in my pocket. My best laid plans did go awry but at least my wallet still has its sanity albeit partially.