Living in Bali offers a westerner, an almost fantasy lifestyle. I say offers, because not everyone attains that level of fantasy. The major elements are a tropical climate, beautiful island, outwardly friendly people, magical culture and of course, cheap cost of living.
Its somewhat surprising then, to encounter and endless procession of westerners living in Bali, who tell me thay either do not like the Balinese, or actually wish Bali had no Balinese. How does a person go from ‘I love this place, I’m moving here and starting a new life’, to ‘I hate everything Balinese’? Here’s my assessment:
•Work:
Westerners are driven to succeed, some more than others. Dealing with the daily curveballs that life in Bali entails, traffic jams, no internet access, power outages, etc. one can become rather combative mentally (’its me against the environment’). When your staff / helpers, do not respond to the call to action, one might feel they are part of the problem. I know what its like being in a hurry, having things not work out and having the local’s relaxed demeanor, seem to make it worse. You know the scene, you’re running late, you show up outside a place and are looking for something. You ask the locals for directions, they don’t know, but laugh and ask you “So Boss where you get your hat? How much you pay for motorbike?” They are just being friendly, but a westerner could interpret the whole thing, as adding to the problem.
•Corruption:
Corruption is rampant in Bali. Shop workers, bank staff, government employees, you name it, are working an angle, or as we say in London ‘a little fiddle’. Constantly having to be on guard against ‘little fiddles’ is exhausting. I’d love to be able to pull up to a petrol pump, when in a car, and sit there while the attendent fills the tank. I don’t do that, because often as not, he will use the pump facing away from me, forcing me to run around and check the dial.
•Personal space:
We westerners can be prissy little bitches, when it comes to personal space, myself included. Balinese society offers little privacy or personal space, everyone having their nose in everyone else’s business. That’s normal for them, strange to us. Often a Balinese person will ask direct questions of a stranger, which lead to more direct questions, which creates the feeling of an interogation.
•Incompetance:
We westerners often feel that we wrote the book on how to do stuff. Whether its building a house / road / restaurant, to working through a process, or trouble shooting, we hold ourselves superior. This is slightly unfair on the locals, especially as they do not have the advantage of a great education. Having things go wrong, and having a local either do nothing, or something completely looney, fulfills the cycle. Its a self fullfilling prophesy, when westerners say Balinese can’t handle anything, and their relaxed demeanor can make it seem they are not bothered when things go wrong. Of course there are cultural traits here too. When you get a disaster here in Indonesia, people don’t go running around screaming as they would in the west. They tend to become quiet or even happy, they made it. I have seen road accidents and there’s no dramatics, by those involved.
In the book I’m reading ‘Jupiter’s Travels‘ , the author says that after riding around the world on a motorbike, he has no doubt, that his mental state, greatly affects the way he acts towards others, which in turn affects the way they respond. I totally agree, and have noticed the pesky touts get testy with mem when I blow them off. When I relax and say ‘hey guys what going on?’ they relax and ease off.
In short, I think Balinese society demands a certain level of interaction, by its members. The western model (every man’s an island) doesn’t work with them. Balinese people think its natural to say hello, ask questions (where have you been, where are you going?) and get a responce. Westerners who do not enjoy this type of interaction will ultimately be unhappy in Bali. I have a lot to learn and living in Bali is part of my education.
{ 4 comments }
You nailed all the points 100% correctly, Nick. Being consciously aware of these points puts you so much further ahead then other who just go “auto pilot”.
Chris
G’day Nick.
There’s ways to deal with the overly nosy. It’s
normal for Indonesians to ask about your marital
status and what you ate, but beyond that you
can opt-out:
“Where are you going?” “dunno yet” (belum tau)
“What is your plan?” “no plan” (ga rencana)
“Do you want to …?” “later” (nanti)
“Our custom is …” “not my custom” (beda adat)
The last one is very useful when facing
relationship communication issues.
Sampe jumpa lagi, James.
Nick you sound kind like MAHATMA GANDHI as balinese i understand the frustration felt by westerner who lived or visit bali especially when your dealing with the goverment issue as there is no clear cut there always unwriten law that can pop up at any times all that regulation and berocrasy.
A lot of thing in bali doesnt make sense to westerner but that just part of balinese culture that lay back attitude no sense of urgentsy as people in bali always says there will be always tomorrow what the rush.as religion and culture in bali are intertwine un-seperatable a way of life daily ritual it is hard for visitors not only westerner but also indonesian to conprehend the deep nature of religion and culture that guide balinesse people on they daily life and activities as written in sansekrete you can not convert to hinduism you got to be born hindhu.
For westerner or expat who wish there’s no balinesse lived in bali i advised them they better leave bali, like people say when you in ROME.i could go on and on but you get what i mean.sukseme banget keep up the good work.putu
Putu,, im sure your right in your reply ,i never cease to enjoy the balinese people and wonder at there grace and ability to walk around problems and look to tomorrow ,,it is stress free existance, and its your island and culture so nobody ,especially expats should feel miffed by your ways ,they should just shrugg and get on with there own lives.I feel im so lucky to visit bali often and soak up the lifestyle and wonderfull warmness of all who i have met in bali.Except the few exceptions along the way who you find in any society ,,just ignore them’ and get on with life at lifes own pace. Evan
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